A blog advocating autism through my own personal experiences and insights.

Growing My Hair Out

In April of last year, 2014, I decided to try something that I’ve never done before with the exception of when I was a very young child (which at that age doesn’t really count). I decided to try growing my hair out. I decided to try this for a variety of reasons and it’s been a pretty eventful journey in the growth of my hair.

I believe I was a bit tired with my old self and wanted a change and I wanted to experiment. A few months into my PhD, I felt great and happier than I had been in my entire life. It’s been the first time I’ve lived completely on my own and making my own living (even if I’m technically still a student) and I believe it was this independence that sparked the will the experiment since I now had the mentality that since I was living my own life I could live it however the way I wanted to. Hair growing seemed to be the perfect new activity to take on. I knew a lot of guys who were also growing their out, but at the same time it’s an activity that’s not so common with the male population that it didn’t take away the thrill of being unique in one more way. I also admire the long hair girls and women typically have and I also felt I wanted to have some of that beauty for myself. It also feels erotic to have longer hair. When I find a girl I want to be with (who will ideally have long hair), one of things I would like to do it is play with it and run my hands through it. However, given a girl may or may not enter my life for another few years yet, growing out my own hair temporarily satisfies this desire.

Whenever I’ve gotten haircuts in the past, I’ve always let my hair grow out a little by about two inches before going back and getting those two inches chopped off. In June 2014, two months after deciding to let my hair grow out more, I realized that I achieved the maximal length of it before getting it cut in the past. But instead of going for another cut, I simply let it grow out some more. Just a couple of weeks later, I felt a sensation that I hadn’t felt for over 20 years and had forgotten about. My hair was making more contact with the sides of my head. It felt like molasses slowly pouring down or like a soft cushion on top of my head. I was excited. It was incredible I continued to wait as patiently as I could for more of it to happen.

As the months wore on, my hair reached down to touch my earlobes and eventually covering them. The so-called awkward stages came, although for me I seemed to still look good. I just wanted my hair longer. I loved how my hair made contact with my cheeks, but I also went through periods when the sensation was too much. Thankfully, last fall, my hair was long enough to be able to be tucked behind my ears whenever I wanted to “free” my cheeks. Now over a year later, I’ve discovered it’s long enough now to be able to tie back into a descent ponytail with few strands escaping. I currently wear my hair this way or if I want to feel my hair brushing against my cheeks and chin (it’s chin-length now!), I’ll wear it down.

I’ve also put more maintenance into my hair than when it was short. When it was short, I always just shampooed in the shower and occasionally brushing and combing it. Now, however, I’ve decided to go with a new brand of shampoo, added a conditioner you put on and wash out in the shower, as well as a stay-in conditioner for afterwards. The type of product that I really like to get for all this are the OGX products. Their products are natural, sulfate-free and some of them smell like milk and coconut. Their stay-in conditioner is called Argan Oil of Morocco and really makes my hair extra soft and silky and manageable, which feels great! I’ve also brought a blow dryer to dry my hair more quickly. I’ve even gone as far as buying a couple of barrel brushes that I use when blow drying to experiment with different ways to shape my hair. I don’t really mind this extra maintenance really. It’s been fun so far.

I don’t know how long I’ll want to keep the long hair, but so far it so far has been worth the experience in growing it out. I wasn’t completely sure how long I would manage to stay the course, but I’m pretty pleased I’ve managed to stick with it for over a year now. I will also soon have the option of donating it if I ever decide to do that. At least for right now, however, having long hair just feels right.

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